Meat, Sex and Supplements

Keeping up with a healthy sex drive throughout your menopause years is not a trivial matter. It all starts with nutrition and exercise. Yes, sex is a symptom of good health and, if promiscuous, a cause for bad health. But let us stay in the realm of nutrition and supplementing. Tomorrow, on Christmas Eve, I’ll officially enter (once again) the one week-long get-fat diet. It’s the only diet I agree to subject my body to. I don’t follow slimming diets because I don’t need them. It’s enough to keep up with a healthy lifestyle in order to be happy in your skin.

Fifty-one weeks a year, I make efforts to dole the portions. Overeating is worse than scarcity. Hubby won’t rant as much about more food as about doubling the dose of our daily supplementing (but that’s more of a financial limitation). Yesterday when we planned together the Christmas menu, out of inertia, I was trying to plan the portions. And he told me not to do this because it’s that time of the year (again!) when we have to pass on portions and switch to the get-fat diet. Yes, let us indulge in overeating and vegetating like hippos in the water, shall we?

Well, the fat hyperbole usually ends up where it begins, in the blog space. I, for one, am gonna leave the blog and dedicate myself, along with my helpers, to overcooking, over baking and spending an extra time in the kitchen.

It’s not enough that I gotta cook every day all the year-long. This because reheated food builds up undesired oxidants and we don’t want them in our bodies. We spend enough on various supplements with an anti-oxidant effect, which means that eating more oxidized food is not an option for our budget, nor for our stomaches.

This is why I have to prepare fresh food, every day. It usually takes me a couple hours to cook lunch. And they devour it in less than an hour. Sure, if you eat in a hurry, then ten minutes will be more than enough. But the fast food thinking is alien to our lifestyle. We think slow food not fast food. After thanking, we spend quite some time while having lunch together, talking nice things, admiring the garden (now that we have a better view across the backyard), complimenting the cook (me) which is a constant with Don — he just compliments me for everything: for my looks, for my walks, for breakfast, for lunch, sometimes for dinner (he usually skips that). I’m not sure if this over-complimenting goes hand in hand with the sexual satisfaction he receives from me. “All I want for Christmas is a blow job” — check it out and whisper a prayer for those guys who can’t get it NOT EVEN as a Christmas present. I give head to my hubby whenever he asks me to… well… not exactly “whenever” just, say, two times out of three.

Okay, back to cooking for Christmas. I’ll serve turkey for different dishes:

Long rolls of minced turkey meat, stuffed with boiled eggs, assorted with rosemary and baked in the oven.

Turkey rolls with dried plums, black pepper, sea salt, fresh rosemary, garlic cloves and onion slices. The baking must be balanced not to darken the crusty surface, too much. Actually, that reddish brownish crust on meats is unhealthy, like anything fried is. So we indulge in this kind of culinary endeavours only through this get-fat diet one-week-a-year exercise.

Stuffed cabbage rolls with the same turkey minced meat, blended with egg and cooked rice, some garlic, all dressed with stiff tomato juice, trapped inside a ceramic stew pot and simmered in the oven for more than an hour.

Guess we’re done with the turkey-based dishes, but not with our Christmas menu:

Chicken soup with veggies.

Baked Alaskan cod-fish slices with lemon and garlic, fast fried in olive oil. Yes, the “no fried food” concept meets an exception here!

Brownies, beiglies, pretzels, strudels, pound cakes, sweet biscuits, sugar-free juices and the constant Vin de Pays d’Oc red wine will adorn the table on Christmas Eve.

The deal with the kids is to spare some for tomorrow because I won’t cook for the next two days in a row. That means we’ll have to reheat — yet another exception from our daily culinary habits.

Under normal conditions, this amount of meat will keep all the six of us happy for about a month. But now we decided to deal with it in a weekend or so.

The food on the market is well colored and highly priced, however the nutrients it provides are below the necessary levels. This is why we consider that a moderate dose of natural supplements won’t do any harm.

However, our daily dose of supplements won’t change dramatically during the get-fat diet week. Don and me will, as always, engulf the 1200mg of soy-based lecithin, the 100mg of coenzyme Q10, the 1200mg of mercury-free fish oil Omega-3, the 1000mg of MSM, the mix of B vitamins, the 1200mg of C vitamin with rose hips extract, the Gingo Biloba extract caps, the coral calcium pills with D3, the magnesium, zinc and selenium dose. They’re so many that I can’t keep track of everything in this supplement-land where Don is the master and the distributor. I don’t know where I’d be without him!

With all the buzz above, what’s left for sex then? Not much, I’m afraid. But keep in mind that a hubby stuffed with so many goodies grows a lower appetite for sex. Anyway, even during this get-fat diet week, I’m at ease with draining his prostate if he insists. What I don’t want to remember is the altered taste of his sperm: more meat in the menu ruins the delicate bitter-sweet flavors of his semen — yet another healthy source of supplements for me 😉 .

Before wrapping it up, let me share a pound cake recipe with you. And don’t criticize me for using sugar, yeast, wheaten flour and other ingredients that are not allowed during our fifty-one weeks slow food lifestyle. Let me indulge into the fast get-fat diet.

Recipe for Four Pound Cakes with Walnuts


4 envelopes of active dry yeast
1 cup of sugar
1 pinch of sea salt dust
6 eggs
2 envelopes of vanilla sugar
1 bio lemon peel
1 liter milk
2000 grams of wheaten flour
200 ml extra virgin olive oil
500 grams of walnut
500 grams of bio raisins
100 ml essence of rum
4 long form baking trays

With a wooden spoon, mix the dry yeast, cup of sugar, pinch of salt, vanilla sugar, minced lemon peel, the six yolks together with one liter of tepid milk.

Pour 1800 grams of sifted flour and dough well by hand until it’s well blended.

Blend the egg whites until they turn into crisp foam.

Have the olive oil near the bowl and begin to dough again, this time adding at first the egg whites, until well blended, then add four hands of olive oil, one by one, while doughing. Keep it well until the dough bubbles and detaches from the bowl.

Leave it in a warm place to leaven.

As the dough leavens, you may get busy preparing the filling. Mince the walnuts and mix them with a bit of sugar, raisins and cocoa, according to your taste. Pour some milk to make a homogeneous paste.

Lay a clean towel on the table, sprinkle flour on the trays, and separate the dough in four equal parts. Flatten the parts one by one, on the towel, spread the filling, roll and place in the floured trays.

Leave another hour to leaven.

Heat the oven at 200 Centigrade. Coat the tops in the trays with beaten eggs. Place the trays in the oven at 200 degrees Celsius for 15 minutes. Then reduce temperature down to 180C. Allow another 35 to 40 minutes for baking in the oven.

Bon Appétit!

And Merry Christmas!

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