Q. What did stop you from taking the pill?
A. First of, I had no sex life before marriage so I had no reason to get and stay on the pill. I don’t regret it.
Q. Really? No sex before marriage?
A. No sex with another guy. Just a “handful” of non-intercourse sex with Don.
Q. How did that work for you? A love story with no intercourse?
A. What can I say other than that it was a sweet long and lovely foreplay time. Something that thrills me every time I’m thinking of it. See, Don is a frank man. He courted me for a couple of months, all in Platonic purity, and then asked me to marry him. We were both laying in his bed, dressed and embraced, listening to a Dire Straits album, down in the so-called “den,” secluded in a far corner of the basement of his parents’ house (those geeks, they usually emerge from some basement, it seems).
He whispered to my ear if I want to be his wife, to share the way and the life with him, and to dream together. He took me by surprise, because the events were running like in a movie set on fast forward. But I saw it coming, I was expecting him to propose in secret, not in public. And my soul was all soaked when I heard his whispering. I said “yes” with a low voice and two sheepish eyes. The moment of romance shortly succumbed to yet another animalistic hug-fest. Remember, we remained clothed all the time, no nudity between us so far! The only thing he introduced in my mouth was his randy tongue.
This first night of that year connected us together by our silently accepted engagement to marry each other (we didn’t make it public until Easter). We never thought of sex outside marriage. For me it would have been shameful and unthinkable. For him, he told me that he was chasing for my soul first and only second for my body. His goal was to make me happy, to give me the comfort and spiritual pleasures that I longed for. He never came to me with the blunt pretension that I have to satisfy his biological needs (at least, this was before we married, afterwards he changed).
With the end of the Christmas Holidays, I had to travel back to school and thus ensued a new series of letters (we had no net during the 80s so, yes, our letters were written on paper). Neglecting his school, he paid me a couple of short visits before the mid February vacation, days ahead of the winter session. The university where I learned was hundreds of kilometers away from home. And we still had to experience seeing each other naked in our intimacy. This eventually occurred during the aforementioned one-week vacation. He gently lured me down to his dark den in the basement, told me that he has a surprise to show me, pretended to look for a book on the shelf, and then, unexpectedly turned the lights on: he was naked! In front of my eyes!!! I was laying in bed at that time, unsuspecting. That was gross! His wagging member pointing North as he stood up in front of me, smiling at me like I was supposed to applaud or something. Ugh, this was the first time in my life when I had a LIVE penis in proximity: pointing at me! Never experienced such a view. Unlike what the young ladies have at their fingertips today, back in our “New Romantic” times of the 80s, there were not much physical channels for nudity, basically magazines and television, I was unaware of both. Shame invaded my inner self. Stupefied, I did not know what to say, how to react, other than taking all the possible shame on me. I wondered if he was ashamed too and I wanted to be ashamed for him. I said to myself that someone must be ashamed in the room. So I took it all on me. He? Shame? No way. He was radiating.
to be continued